tawss04 Posted February 21, 2007 Report Share Posted February 21, 2007 What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan What is a Yankee? The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone. What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover ? The position of the dirt bag Why is divorce so expensive? Because it's worth it. What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over? Doughnuts? Why is air a lot like sex? Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any What do you call a smart blonde? A golden retriever. What do attorneys use for birth control? Their personalities. What's the difference between a girlfriend and wife? 45 lbs What's the difference between a boyfriend and husband? 45 minutes What's the fastest way to a man's heart? Through his chest with a sharp knife. Why do men want to marry virgins? They can't stand criticism. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking? Because those men already have boyfriends. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? After a year, the dog is still excited to see you What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex? Because they have cotton balls. What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW? A porcupine has the pricks on the outside. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? "Are you sure it's mine?" Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex? Mace will do that to you. Why did OJ Simpson want to move to Arkansas ? Everyone has the same DNA. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Breasts don't have eyes. What's the difference between a new girlfriend and a new dog? After 2 weeks, you still call the dog. Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi? He walks around saying "Yo." Why do drivers' education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays? Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it. Where does an Irish family go on vacation? A different bar. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? They named him "Sum Ting Wong What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A speech impediment. What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast? They're hiring. What's the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo? A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with... "a recipe". How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*! Why is there no Disneyland in China ? No one's tall enough to go on the good rides AND ... LAST BUT NOT LEAST What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale? A northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..." A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rivierakid55 Posted February 21, 2007 Report Share Posted February 21, 2007 most of these are oldies but goodies. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? They named him "Sum Ting Wong this one had me rolling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
onyx_ss Posted February 21, 2007 Report Share Posted February 21, 2007 most of these are oldies but goodies. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? They named him "Sum Ting Wong this one had me rolling. That one is great! Onyx Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jon1178 Posted February 21, 2007 Report Share Posted February 21, 2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
perk03z06 Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 I'll add one ... What do you call a prostitute with her hands in her pants? Self-Employed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertss Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 here's mine why do women have legs? so they dont leave a trail like a snail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montanass Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?He walks around saying "Yo." I dont get it a majority of those are pretty funny, I like the one about the bimmer Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desertss Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?He walks around saying "Yo." I dont get it a majority of those are pretty funny, I like the one about the bimmer jewish use the word oy alot...... like oy vey.. think it means o shit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
montanass Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 thanks... I'm not familiar with the Jewish religion, so it was like Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2006SilverSS Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 most of these are oldies but goodies. Did you hear about the Chinese couple that had a retarded baby? They named him "Sum Ting Wong this one had me rolling. That one is great! Onyx I really liked that one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyrome Posted February 22, 2007 Report Share Posted February 22, 2007 fuuny stuff Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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