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The Pig


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A continuation of the WILDLIFE post in Gasoline Alley,

but safe for here :jester: Thought I would share with all

 

A farmer walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says:

"Darling,

this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache."

 

His wife, lying in bed, replies: "That's a sheep, you idiot."

 

Replies the farmer, "I wasn't talking to you."

 

 

:cheers:

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A missionary was working with a cannibal tribe, trying to convert them to Jesus.

One day the cannibal chief's wife gives birth to an albino baby. Convinced the missionary had something to do with it, the chief comes storming up to him yelling blue murder and ready to light the cooking fire. The missionary tries to calm him down: "Listen chief, God works in mysterious ways; see all the white sheep on the hill?"

 

"Yes."

 

"And see the one little black sheep?"

 

The chief looks thunderstruck and turns to the missionary: “OK; You no tell, I no tell!"

 

Mr. P. :)

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A man is shipwrecked onto a desert island, the only other survivors are a dog and a sheep. After a few weeks on the island, the man starts to eye the sheep as a potential outlet for his built-up sexual energy.

 

The dog, however, will have none of this. Every time the man starts to approach the sheep the dog starts to growl menacingly, preventing the man from getting close to the sheep. This continues for weeks.

 

One morning, however, the man notices a body floating ashore. Upon inspection he finds it to be a half-alive woman, almost naked, and he quickly revives her. She looks up at her savior and says, "Thank you, thank you. I owe my life to you. How can I ever repay you? I'll do anything for you that you'd like - just name it."

 

The man thinks for a second, then says, "Take this dog for a walk..."

 

Mr. P. :)

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