I'm From the Government, I'm here to Help

[hot rod truck]

Perhaps this will help explain it all

 

 

A Washington, DC airport ticket agent offers some examples of why our

country is in trouble!

 

1. I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat so that

her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

 

2. I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to

Capetown.

I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport

information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid,

but Capetown is in Massachusetts," Without trying to make her look stupid,

I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in

Africa,"

Her response - click.

 

3. A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package

we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he

was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that's not possible,

since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me, I

looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state!"

 

 

4. An aide for a cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent

a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only a

1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car,

he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car to

drive between gates to save time."

 

5. An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how

it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:30 am and got to

Chicago at 8:33 am. I explained that Michigan was an hour ahead of

Illinois, but she couldn't understand the concept of time zones. Finally,

I told her the plane went fast, and she bought that.

 

6. A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical

description on your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to whom?" I

said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the

airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said (FAT), and I'm overweight.

I think that's very rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I

looked into it (I was laughing) I came back and explained the city code

for Fresno, CA is (FAT), and the airline was just putting a destination tag on

her luggage.

 

7. A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly

to California, and then take the train to Hawaii?"

 

8. I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How

do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to

which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these

planes have numbers on them."

 

9. A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola,

Florida.

Do I have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if

she meant fly to Pensacola, Fl. On a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah,

whatever, smarty!"

 

10. A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he

needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about

passports, I reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've

been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked

and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,

"Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my

American Express!"

 

11. A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to

go from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words. Finally, I said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?"

Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the lady. After some searching,

I came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in

the country and can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh,

don't be silly! Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!"So I scoured a map

of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do

you?" The reply? "Whatever! I knew it was a big animal".

 

 

Now you know why Government is in the shape that it's in!

 

 

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

[WI_Dave]

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

 

[Generalms02]

[ThePDB]

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

  

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

YUP, and that's why you don't have a gun Brian Cause you'd ****** shoot someone

[tawss04]

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

  

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[CoolBlueSS]

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

  

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

[zippy]

It would be a fun job. I get so many stupid people coming into my work every day just like those.

[hot rod truck]

Some people are alive only because it's against the law to shoot them!

  

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

YUP, and that's why you don't have a gun Brian Cause you'd ****** shoot someone

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

That's true

I forgot talking about that when I posted this

Part Timers disease kickin' in

 

Another Zippy True Tale ...

[IdriveGTP]

[Kim]

[CoolBlueSS]

It would be a fun job. I get so many stupid people coming into my work every day just like those.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's so true. I bet if you got a few auto part people together we could write a book of funny, but true, stories.

[hot rod truck]

It would be a fun job. I get so many stupid people coming into my work every day just like those.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

That's so true. I bet if you got a few auto part people together we could write a book of funny, but true, stories.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

 

...And new ways to eliminate them from the gene pool

[budhayes3]

Yea, we get alot of customers like that at Lexus too...amazing that people so dumb can manage to be so rich There should be an idiot tax for people like that, but unfortunately it would never pass since the idiots are the ones in charge

[Stitches040]

[AJSmyth]