I CORNER Posted September 23, 2004 Report Share Posted September 23, 2004 You just might be a Floridian if: - You exhibit a slight twitch when introduced to anyone with the first names of Charley, Frances or Ivan (or Jeanne). - Your freezer never has more than $20 worth of food in it any given time - You're looking at paint swatches for the plywood on your windows, to accent the house color - You think of your hall closet/saferoom as "cozy" - Your pool is more accurately described as "framed in" than "screened in" - Your freezer in the garage now only has homemade ice in it - You no longer worry about relatives visiting during the summer months - You too haven't heard back from the insurance adjuster - You now understand what that little "2% hurricane deductible" phrase really means - You're putting a collage together on your driveway of roof shingles from your neighborhood - You were once proud of your 16" electric chain saw - Your Street has more than 3 "NO WAKE" signs posted - You now own 5 large ice chests - Your parrot can now say" hammered, pounded and hunker down" - You recognize people in line at the free ice, gas and plywood locations - You stop what you're doing and clap and wave when you see a convoy of power company trucks come down your street - You're depressed when they don't stop - You have the personal cell phone numbers of the managers for: plywood, roofing supplies and generators at Home Depot on your speed dialer - You've spent more than $20 on "Tall white kitchen bags" to make your own sand bags - You're considering upgrading your 16" to a 20" chainsaw - You know what "Bar chain oil" is - You're thinking of getting your wife the hardhat with the ear protector and face shield for Christmas - You now think the $6000 whole house generator seems reasonable - You look forward to discussions about the merits of "cubed, block and dry ice" - Your therapist refers to your condition as "generator envy" - You fight the urge to put on your winter coat and wool cap and parade around in front of your picture window, when you finally get power and your neighbor across the street, with the noisy generator doesn't get electric And finally, you might be a Floridian if - You ask your sister up north to start saving the Sunday Real Estate classifieds! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zippy Posted September 23, 2004 Report Share Posted September 23, 2004 if you use a kite as a method of transportation.... if walk out front of your house and find a boat in your yard and you don't own one... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
m396 #00-011 Posted September 23, 2004 Report Share Posted September 23, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blackhawk Posted September 24, 2004 Report Share Posted September 24, 2004 If you wake in the morning surrounded by munchkins and say…there’s no place like home… Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I CORNER Posted September 24, 2004 Author Report Share Posted September 24, 2004 Some more thoughts about hurricanes: - How about a movie where the main character wakes up each morning to an approaching hurricane. We could call it "Hurricane Day". - Here it is, a couple of days before Christmas, and we are preparing for hurricane Zachary, the tenth hurricane predicted to hit southeastern Florida. It is predicted to cause minimal damage, mainly because there's nothing left to damage. Also, we need to watch tropical storm Ardvark, which is likely to intensify to a Category 2 hurricane and bring a New Year's Eve surprise to Florida. - Speaking of Christmas, what is the proper way of putting Christmas lights on hurricane shutters? Should we outline them? Paint them red and green? How many lights can be powered from a 5KW generator? - Two people were seen buying batteries and water; they were determined to be new to Florida. Everyone else already had enough supplies. - Insurance companies have increased rates due to the increased fire hazard from all the plywood shutters installed. - Florida Power & Light has requested a rate increase due to lost revenues attributed to the thousands of new Independent Power Producers with average rating of 5KW each. - I remember when Florida used to have trees. - When mowing the lawn, lifejackets and a chain saw are required. - Hurricane shutter installation is now an Olympic event. - Hurricanes don't blow - Florida sucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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