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LMFAO....


SSminneapolis

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This was posted by a guy on the oil message board where I'm one of the admins.

 

 

Last Thursday I put out one of my Bush/Cheney signs in my front

yard. Between midnight and 3:00 a.m. someone stole it. On Friday night I

put out sign No. 2. Since I didn't have to get up early, I thought my

dog and I would "stake out" our sign. This time I put the sign a

little

closer to the gate leading to my backyard. With my dog on an extra long

leash, I planted myself on a lawn chair and read "Unfit for Command"

by

flashlight until about 1:00 a.m. Here comes the fun part . . . I noticed

that the car coming down the street was slowing down and pulling over to

the curb right next to my yard. Sure enough, he gets out of his car and

heads right for my sign. Just as he was about to uproot and desecrate

it, I opened my gate and let my dog make the initial introduction! As he

ran to hide behind the rear end of his car, I promptly moved to the

driver-side door, which was still open. It was a fairly nice car with

power everything and still running. While my dog continued to

"introduce" herself, I rolled up the window and hit the power door

lock

button. With that, I slammed the door, grabbed my Bush sign and headed

into the back yard.

 

And now for the "rest of the story." About 40 minutes later, I

heard a

knock at the door. I opened the door to one of our city's finest . . .

the Vancouver Police Department. The officer asked me what was going on

and when I told him, he could not stop laughing! I followed him out to

the perp's car and stood there while he asked the guy a few more

questions. Upon learning that the guy lived a couple of streets down, I

-- knowing what was about to happen -- asked him, "Why do you have

Oregon plates on your car if you live just down the street (here in

Vancouver, Wash.)?"

 

Oregon has no sales tax, so often Washington residents will buy

and register cars in Oregon to avoid paying sales tax . . . it's a crime

and the fine is pretty stiff. Here comes the best part. . . . The look

on this guy's face told me he knew he was about to get busted. When the

officer asked for his license and registration, the "Democrat"

mumbled

that (his license) was suspended. Just for kicks and giggles I asked the

officer if he smelled any alcohol coming from the guy! The officer

looked at me, smiled and promptly gave him a field breathalyzer test.

Guess what? You got it, he blew a .10, legally drunk in the state of

Washington.

 

DUI, illegal registration and the brand of "MORON," all 'cause he

hates

Bush!

 

Cost of Bush signs: $5.95 each

 

Cost of Flashlight batteries: $3.95 per Pack

 

Seeing a Leftwing Numbskull carted off to the hoosegow: Priceless.

 

:crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup:

:crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup::crackup:

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Just to be "Fair and Balanced" :D (not that I mind seeing fewer Kerry signs).

What's the point of stealing signs anyway? Your not changing anyone's mind. And anyone who makes their voting choices based on yard signs and bumper stickers should have their right to vote permanently revoked!

 

Man knocks himself out stealing campaign signs

 

By Tinuola Awopetu, Court TV

 

(Court TV) — A Republican in Colorado fell flat on his face trying to steal campaign signs touting John Kerry (news - web sites) and other local Democratic candidates.

 

According to Wheat Ridge Police spokesperson Officer Lisa Stigall, Randal Wagner was already wanted for questioning about a rash of campaign-sign thefts when he was discovered lying unconscious across a stolen sign Oct. 13.

 

Earlier that evening, a homeowner reported to police that he saw Wagner, 50, cutting down a campaign sign bolted to his fence. The sign was in support of a local Democratic candidate running for Congress.

 

The man confronted Wagner, who allegedly fled in a truck with his wife. The man gave the vehicle's plate number to police.

 

While police located the Wagners' home, Wagner was busy at work on another sign put up by a store in the business district, Stigall said.

 

But he encountered resistance.

 

"He already had the sign in hand and was running out of the parking lot when he tripped over a low chain that blocked off the driveway," Stigall said.

 

Wagner fell flat on his face and was knocked unconscious. His wife, unaware of his accident, remained in the car.

 

An officer driving by noticed the figure lying on the ground and called for an ambulance. Wagner was treated for cuts and abrasions to his face.

 

Police discovered two dozen campaign signs in the back of the couple's truck and issued Wagner a summons for theft, trespassing, criminal tampering and disorderly conduct.

 

The outcome of the presidential race won't be the only thing keeping Wagner on his toes in November. He's scheduled to appear in court Nov. 22 to find out if he'll receive jail time.

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