a-blur-by-you Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 Just to update you all on my situation. Erik (turbochargedberserker) purchased the carbon fiber hood. Thanks Erik...BTW it's will ship out today and I will PM ya Steve, Thank you for lending an ear. As far as my marriage, still no word from my wife (been 11 days). Actually when I was working on Saturday my neighbor calls me and said she was at the house with her dad. I took off from work and saw here there with her dad. Broke my heart because she looked at me with no feeling or emotion. Too make a long story short I asked her what she wanted to do, yet no reply from her. Her dad wasn't at all cheery with me, but I won't get into that. Needless to say I know where this is headed so I saw my lawyer yesterday. I cannot believe after 13 years of life together it ends like this. I am confident I will not here from her again nor will I see her again on free terms. I can't erase memories nor emotions but they will fade. Honestly my wife gave up on a marriage I knew could've lasted a very long time. My last words to her were "I did nothing but love you", said nothing back to me, and drove off. What went wrong? I've asked myself a thousand times, yet I need to be content with my answer. I cannot focus my energy and thoughts on something I cannot change. Thanks again for all the support! Greg Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bowtie70SS Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 Been there done that...I was overseas in the Military when my ex left. You're better off. I say that because you definately want someone who's gonna love you back, it can't be all one-sided. Good luck, chin up! Dave Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
misterp Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 I cannot believe after 13 years of life together it ends like this. Hate to be campy at a time like this but that's just another unavoidable fact of life: “All things end badly, or else they wouldn’t end.” - Cocktail. Her dad wasn't at all cheery with meF******ck him. Too make a long story short I asked her what she wanted to do...GOOD MOVE You are taking charge of your end of matters, that is a good sign. You are committed to this thing to the end, no matter what that end is. I can't erase memories nor emotions but they will fade.It's not so much they fade but rather that with more time and constructive reflection you will figure it out and put these things into their proper persepctive. In all fairness, you cannot assume or question what your spouse does or does not feel; you cannot read her mind, and until she tells you it cannot be assumed. Her stonewalling might be the result of the fact that she has more emotion inside than she can handle, and if she utters a single word the dam will burst and she will loose her composure. That's just my opinion. Mr. P. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
drako Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 well, it hurts me to say it but her showing no emotion to yo will speed up the healing process, not even your heart will love someone that does not love you back for a prolonged period of time. i wish you can have some closure, because that must be one big thing that you would want. (why this all happened) i would focus on things you have right now, your family and your friends. anyways ill let mister p chime in with his knowledge jose Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackySS13 Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 She left you when you were overseas serving our country. That is just wrong. On another note. he is totally right. It can't be all one sided. I was in a relationship like that and I was never so stressed out as I was dating her. Glad it didn't work out. Good luck Greg. Time is on your side. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CoolBlueSS Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 She obviously has issues. I know it probably doesn't feel like it, but you're going to be better off. Good luck in the future. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kaotik1 Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 I cannot believe after 13 years of life together it ends like this. Hate to be campy at a time like this but that's just another unavoidable fact of life: “All things end badly, or else they wouldn’t end.” - Cocktail. Her dad wasn't at all cheery with meF******ck him. Too make a long story short I asked her what she wanted to do...GOOD MOVE You are taking charge of your end of matters, that is a good sign. You are committed to this thing to the end, no matter what that end is. I can't erase memories nor emotions but they will fade.It's not so much they fade but rather that with more time and constructive reflection you will figure it out and put these things into their proper persepctive. In all fairness, you cannot assume or question what your spouse does or does not feel; you cannot read her mind, and until she tells you it cannot be assumed. Her stonewalling might be the result of the fact that she has more emotion inside than she can handle, and if she utters a single word the dam will burst and she will loose her composure. That's just my opinion. Mr. P. <{POST_SNAPBACK}> You will never forget her, 13 years, 13 minutes, that girl is apart of you now, good or bad. All you can do is be positive, hold strong and move on knowing in your heart, you tried your best. People change with time and time changes people, thats life. It's just a matter of time now before your happy again, and it will happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dylan06SS Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 (edited) Sorry to hear she isn't willing to work on things... sounds like maybe you gave the marrige more effort than she did... and if thats the case maybe you deserve someone who values, loves, and respects you as much as you do them. Just walking out and being so cold about it shows how emotionally shallow and small she is... a person who REALLY loved you would stop short of nothing to make the marrige last. I know I'd go to the ends of the earth to hold on to what my wife and I have... sounds like you would too... but it also sounds like she wouldn't. Sad situation, but I'm sure in the long run this will be better for you. Best of luck. Edited May 31, 2006 by Dylan06SS (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
packjh Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 Sorry to hear that dude, Im actually going thru the same thing right now. Honestly Its way to complicated, i have to schedule my court date tomorrow and sign the papers. Pretty much all i had to come home to was my truck and a bed. Stick in there dude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
haul@ss Posted May 31, 2006 Report Share Posted May 31, 2006 (edited) wow... well i cant really say anything because i dont have as much experience as you all... but hang in there. Just try to keep yourself occupied... but make sure you always have someone to talk to... keepin things inside just isnt healthy. Obviously you got a bunch of us guys here who are willing to listen and help in any way possible. Some things are just not meant to be... Things could have been better but it's not the end of the world. You still have a bunch of people who love and care for you, so just stay strong. If ya need any help, you know we're always here. Good luck with everything and take care Edited May 31, 2006 by haul@ss (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TurbochargedBerserker Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 Well, bro, it sucks, but now you know. Like I said: people who are okay with treating you like that don't deserve to be with you anyway. Good to see you're taking charge and handling your business despite the provocations. If you'll permit yet more advice: Don't get wrapped up in the good times right now. You'll have plenty of time for remembering them later. What will help keep you on course atm, is for every good thing you remember, recall a not so good thing. Keep the balance, and keep the reasons for your split in mind -- it will make it easier to bounce out of the melancholies to remember that this is a good move on your part, a move that frees you up for something better down the road. What went wrong? I've asked myself a thousand times, yet I need to be content with my answer It doesn't matter what blew up, honestly. I know all about the need to know as I've expressed to you in PM and god forbid your situation was like mine was, but take something away from what I went through: You can't control what others do or what happens to others -- sometimes you just have to be content with what happens on your end. Let it go -- you'll get over this faster and get on with your life. Trust me when I say I know what I'm asking you to do and how hard it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sum 1 Posted June 1, 2006 Report Share Posted June 1, 2006 I hate her for you. She's a dumbass. Go find 100 chix who like you and feel good about yourself again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a-blur-by-you Posted June 2, 2006 Author Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 (edited) sum 1, turbochargedberserker, misterp, dylan.....to all thanks!! I'm sure today she will get served. Not a thought from the heart obviously, but in mind. I was told by many people this is the right thing to do. She clearly scarred me pretty emotionally and giving her the satisfaction of the final touch in her serving me a divorce I don't think she will expect it at all. I'm sure she is thinking I will just wait and wait for her as I did 2 years ago. I waited 5 months for and het rock bottom. Depression set in, I was on medication, and had a counsler try to lift my spirits. I think since I have been down this road before things seem more balanced but not any easier. I do have a question though, I have got a stack of mail for her. I guess in all honesty I could just keep it and see if she has the maturity to call or should I not even worry about it and just keep it in a box. It's impossible for her to get in the house again because after last weekend I changed the locks out and reprogrammed the garage door, which is how she got in last time. What should I do about that? Things are progressing slowly getting used to the idea she is out of my life for good. It's still hard for me to invision being alone after all those years together, but I'm thinking now as Dylan said..."being as cold as she is makes her emotionally shallow and I'm realizing how small she is as a person". I really am fighting through this. I really don't mean to run my life's problems on the forum but you guys really lift me in so many ways and I thank you all for that! Greg Edited June 2, 2006 by a-blur-by-you (see edit history) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmergencyVP1 Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Im very sorry to hear of your situation. Time and friends will help heal you. As far as the mail goes, you may want to check with your lawyer. But you could mark it as no longer residing here, and let the local post office branch take care of it. Take care and keep your chin up !! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holty Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 sorry to hear about all your problems man. i don't really have any advice or suggestions for you, but i really think things will work out in the end. you are in my prayers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.