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Bad Bowtie

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Posts posted by Bad Bowtie

  8. JOTD: "One for You, One for Me..."

    in Off-Topic/General

    Posted

    On the outskirts of a small town, there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence. One day, two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.

     

    'One for you, one for me, one for you, one for me,' said one boy. Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

     

    Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery. He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, 'One for you, one for me, one for you,

    One for me...'

     

    He just knew what it was. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along.

     

    'Come here quick,' said the boy, 'you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls!'

     

    The man said, 'Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk.' When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled slowly to the cemetery.

     

    Standing by the fence they heard, 'One for you, one for me. One for you, One for me.'

     

    The old man whispered, 'Boy, you've been tellin' me the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord...

     

    Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord.

     

    At last they heard, 'One for you, one for me. That's all.. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence and we'll be done....

     

    They say the old man had the lead for a good half-mile before the kid on the bike passed him...

     

    :jester:

  18. JOTD: Is Sex Work or Pleasure??

    in Off-Topic/General

    Posted · Edited by Bad Bowtie (see edit history)

    An RAF Group Captain was about to start the morning briefing to his staff ....

     

    While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its brewing, the Group Captain decided to pose a question to all assembled.

     

    He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep.

     

    He posed the question of just how much of sex was "work" and how much of it was "pleasure"

     

    • A Wing Commander chimed in with 75-25% in favour of work.

    • A Squadron Leader said it was 50-50%.

    • A Flight Lieutenant responded with 25-75% in favour of pleasure, depending upon his state of inebriation at the time.

     

    There being no consensus, the Group Captain turned to the young Corporal who was in charge of making the coffee.

     

    What the Group Captain wondered was his opinion?

     

    Without any hesitation, the young Corporal responded, "Sir, it has to be 100% pleasure."

     

    The Group Captain was surprised and, as you might guess, asked "And, why exactly would that be the case?"

     

    The young Corporal replied, "Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."

     

    The room fell silent....

     

    May God Bless the lower ranks. :flag:

  19. What a day yesterday

    in Off-Topic/General

    Posted

    50 dollars

     

    I show dealer list at $86.42, Wholesale at $64.81, & dealer COST at $51.85 These prices don't include tax either.

     

    I'll sell one of mine (new in GM box) to you for $50.00 flat out & I'll pay the shiping to OK City.

     

    Let me know if your still interested... :thumbsup:

  21. JOTD: No Sex since 1955.

    in Off-Topic/General

    Posted

    A crusty old Marine Sergeant Major found himself at a gala event hosted by a local liberal arts college. There was no shortage of extremely young idealistic liberal ladies in attendance, one of whom approached the Sergeant Major for conversation.

     

    "Excuse me, Sergeant Major, but you seem to be a very serious man. Is something bothering you?"

     

    "Negative, ma'am. Just serious by nature."

     

    The young lady looked at his awards and decorations and said, "It looks like you have seen a lot of action."

     

    "Yes, ma'am, a lot of action." The sarge replied.

     

    The young lady, tiring of trying to start up a conversation, said, "You know, you should lighten up a little. Relax and enjoy yourself."

     

    The Sergeant Major just stared at her in his serious manner.

     

    Finally the young lady said, "You know, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but when was the last time you had sex?"

     

    "1955, ma'am."

     

    "Well, there you are. No wonder you're so serious. You really need to chill out and relax! I mean no sex since 1955! Come with me." She responded.

     

    She took his hand and led him to a private room where she proceeded to "relax" him several times.

     

    Afterward, panting for breath, she leaned against his grizzled bare chest and said, "Wow, you sure didn't forget much since 1955."

     

    The Sergeant Major said in his serious voice, after glancing at his watch, "I hope not; it's only 2130 now."

     

    Gotta love military time. :thumbsup::crackup:

  24. Dale Earnhardt Rc Silverado

    in For Sale/ Wanted

    Posted · Edited by Bad Bowtie (see edit history)

    I have a used one for sale, everything works, but no box.

     

    I ran it up & down the driveway a few times & scared my wife's cat with it a few times- Here in the house. :cool:

     

    I did notice some rub marks on the right bedside above the tire opening (from storage I guess) :(

     

    -Jon in TX.

     

     

    I also have a black "Jesse James R/C Silverado SS", also used w/o original box.

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